Saturday, January 1, 2011

Belated Christmas Thoughts

The following excerpt is from an short address I was asked to give at a women's meeting for my church in early December on the theme of peace & joy. I know people who read this blog have different faiths and beliefs. So I hesitated in posting this message. But in the end, obviously, I'm posting it. I considered much of it my way of saying "thank-you" through the lens of my faith.


When I was asked to speak about peace and joy tonight, my first reaction was, “Peace and joy??? This is not the season of peace and joy for me. It is the season of dread, especially as I wait for my hair to start falling out.” About two nights ago, it really sank in… that I would lose my hair and lose it soon due to my cancer treatment. For some that know me, that might sound odd. I’ve joked about it for months. I bought a wig, had the wig cut. I cut my hair short to make its departure less disturbing. I borrowed clippers to have on hand to shave my head when it all starts falling out. But that’s just the way I am. Change is not real until it’s actually about to happen or happening.

But in other ways, this period of my life makes it easy to talk about tonight’s topic. In the midst of my health problems, I also have felt great peace and joy.

There is a scripture in my church that says when you are helping your fellow beings, you are serving your God. In our struggles, I have often thought about when the baby Jesus was born. People were so excited for this birth. Scriptures prophesied of it for years. Angels heralded it. Shepherds travelled from their fields to see him. Wise men searched the sky for signs of the event. Then when the sign was sited, the wise men travelled from even farther, bringing the baby valuable gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. I’m sure there were other gifts too – ones that didn’t make it into the account in the scriptures.

In the fictional Drummer Boy song, the boy runs with others to honor the newborn King, the baby Jesus. Everyone in the crowd is bringing their finest presents for the baby. The boy then feels embarrassed at what he can offer. He sings, “Little baby I am a poor boy too. I have no gift to bring that’s fit to give the King.”

He decides though to give the baby the best he can and plays a song for him.

When I tell my children the nativity story, I remind them that we can no longer bring physical presents to the baby Jesus to celebrate his birthday at this time of year. But we can give him other gifts: we can help others. We can try to be more like him.

I obviously am not the baby Jesus. I’m not tiny and helpless. I am a girl, not a boy. But in my health struggles, I have been touched by the many gifts and service people have offered us. Sometimes in seeing people help us, I’ve felt like I’ve had this ringside seat at the manger, watching people offer the best they can think of… from my neighbors pitching in to buy us a freezer to hold the frozen meals they would purchase for us, from someone recognizing my rocking chair was broken and offering to fix it, from my sister-in-law and her friend pumping milk nightly and freezing it so my child could have some breastmilk (later on her lactation consultant got a company to gift these two women electric breast pumps and bags to make their service easier), to my photo book, to the kind notes people have written, to people watching my kids so I could rest, bringing us meals, offering to run errands and countless other acts.

For us, there has been great peace and joy this season.

I also like this season because it reminds me again of Jesus’ wonderful role. In John 14:6, Jesus said to his apostles: “I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” When I’ve pondered this phrase lately, I’ve thought less upon the milestones that we need to achieve in this life, but tend to hear in it more and more that it refers to the person we need to become. With some caveats, for me it seems the way to return to the Father is not a set path but whatever path we need to become like Jesus.

Jesus showed us the way we need to treat others. He didn’t judge their worth on one action. He saw their entire worth. He spent time with the lowly. Not only did he preach to the people, but he helped them. The New Testamant is full of healing stories. In the cancer world, I’ve heard the statistic that 1 out of every 2 men will have some kind of cancer at some point in their life. For women, there is a 1 in 3 statistic. In a time with no modern medicine, I imagine these actions by Jesus were a precious gift.

And there are many instances where he helped people before he bothered to say one word about preaching to them or even at all. To the lady caught in adultery, he saved her life before he simply told her to go and sin no more. To the people who followed him so far into a desert land that it was difficult to find food, he turned 2 fish and 5 loaves of bread into a meal to feed 5,000.

For me thinking about Jesus brings me almost a magical feeling of hope - that someone did complete his mission on the Earth perfectly, even though no one else would. And even though he completed his mission without flaw, he would be happy with the best gifts I could offer, like he would have been with the drummer boy’s gift - if that story had been a true story.

In some ways we all are like the drummer boy. None of us can give every gift there is to give. Maybe our gifts are not even what others consider the finest. But from our talents and abilities and the people we know that only we can touch in certain ways, we can give our own unique and beautiful gift to Jesus – the best we have to give. And I imagine it would make him smile, just like the song, which finishes like thus as the drummer boy starts to play:

Mary nodded, pa rum pum pum pum

The ox and lamb kept time, pa rum pum pum pum

I played my drum for Him, pa rum pum pum pum

I played my best for Him, pa rum pum pum pum,

rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,

THEN HE SMILED AT ME, pa rum pum pum pum



  1. You keep amazing me. Thank you for sharing this message. It's the best one I've heard this Christmas season to make me feel the spirit of the season. I love you so.

  2. I completely agree with Alisha. I so needed this message. You amaze & inspire me on a daily basis. Hoping the New Year brings you continued peace & joy & most important a clean bill of health for you & your baby! Love you!!!

  3. KJ! You are always an inspiration. Thank you! I love you, girl. Can't wait to see you Saturday!!

  4. You are amazing - sending huge hugs your way. You rock!

  5. You have, like the others said, inspired me to go out and give my best gifts to others KJ. I love hearing that people are trying their best to help you. I sure wish I was nearby to help too. You are amazing! xoxo Robin

  6. Wow, Kathy. Just wow. You are amazing! Much love to you and your family.